![]() Me: “No, this is because you’re a g**d*** thief. ![]() I yell across the floor in broadest vernacular Viennese. Man #1: *In English* “What? What’s that? This is an outrage! You’re doing this just because I’m a foreigner, right?” ![]() Loss prevention gets involved and they start to complain. When the two men get to the checkout, I do point them out. The employee asks me if I would be willing to stick around and point them out, which I do. I explain that they think they’re safe because they use a foreign language, but I understood them. I go to the front of the store and inform the person at the counter that I just listened to two guys talking about stealing merchandise. I keep nodding and grinning, and I wish them a great stay. Man #2: “Yeah, you Americans are just too stupid to understand when you’re being robbed, ain’t you?” I nod and continue smiling as I walk by, telling them (in English) that I’m happy to see them, welcoming them to the US, and all that. I smile at them while I pass, and one of them smiles back. I casually walk around the aisle because I want to meet my former compatriots, and there are two guys perusing the computer games, amiably chatting in Viennese German about what games to steal. When I heard “our” vernacular, I was kind of already listening for that lovely sound of “home”. I’m browsing for merchandise in a store when I overhear someone in the aisle next to mine talking quite loudly, in the broadest, deepest Vienna vernacular possible. ![]() I’m originally from Vienna, but this happens in the US. Some German dialects are insanely difficult to understand for a non-native speaker they’re basically incomprehensible, especially if the people speaking them don’t want you to understand. ![]()
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